Tuesday, February 13

coping, condolences

Monday is deadline day, which means that I have no contact with normal life or media until my deadlines expire at 5 p.m., which is usually extended until around 7 p.m. because I am never on time for anything.

When Curtis came home around 8 p.m. and told me about the shootings at Trolley Square, I was alarmed, confused. I turned on the evening news, but found that not much information was being released, except that a certain number of people had been victims of gunpoint and either survived, or did not.

When I opened my computer this morning and saw that not just a couple, but that a handful of individuals had been shot and killed--and that two others were critically injured--my jaw dropped and heart melted. A fifteen-year-old?

But Bridgett works at Banana Republic. But Kim and I go to Trolley to get our pants hemmed on a regular basis. But Trolley is a cute little mall where I enjoyed my first white chocolate caramel apple with Curtis. But, it could have been any of us.

But it wasn't. And I squeezed my husband's hand a little harder before I left for the office this morning. And breathed a healthy sigh of relief.

It's not fair to say that I'm coping; the tragedy isn't mine and I don't claim it to be. Still, I'm dealing with heartwrenching possibilities--possibilities that didn't play out on anyone that I know and love. Fate played in my favor, which makes me feel a little lucky and also, a little guilty.

My heartfilled condolences to anyone who lost a love this Valentine's Day.

7 comments:

marta said...

ali, your condolences are so eloquent. thank you for such a heartfelt entry. i agree with you and feel such pain for those who have lost so much.

tiffany said...

Beautiful post, Ali. Thanks for saying it all so well. [sigh]

Brad K. said...

Ali, you are a really good writer.

I am glad you are my friend.

Lorilee said...

Ali, I think you wrapped up my feelings perfectly on this tragic event. I too, was shocked and interested in the beginning, but then it all became so real--realizing that two of the girls killed were my age, and that a Father and son were gunned down in a parking lot---a parking lot we've parked in too many times to remember-- after Valentine's Day shopping for their wife and mother. It really does help you to appreciate your Valentine that much more.

jamieanne said...

This is frightening and heartbreaking at the same time. People out here keep asking us if we know where Trolley Mall is, and if it's in a bad area of town. The sad realization is that it's not and we've all been there, safely, comfortably far too many times for something like this to happen.

Kim said...

Ali that was a great entry. Zack and I can't stop thinking about it. Actually we got a call that night to go to dinner at the Spag. Factory but we had to decline because Zack thought his soccer game was at 7:00 so we rushed out to the game that was actually at 8:50. We were saved by the schedule that was printed wrong and were so thankful! I'm so glad all of you weren't there too!

ali said...

Thanks, guys. It was stream of consciousness and it helped me.